Tag Archives: sacrament


8 Mar


I saw this and had to share:

A few days ago, I encouraged the pest control guy (while he was setting traps in my house) to come and check out the Mass on Sunday morning. Just yesterday, I said the same thing to the checkout guy at Kwik Trip. Both of these guys had admitted that they had left the Church years ago.
Two days ago, I was standing in someone’s kitchen with a couple of guys, and I got talking about how Confession is so amazing and, with that simple prayer of absolution, we get “do-overs;” we are made a brand new person. They both admitted they had not gone in decades and, two minutes later, we were stepping into the next room to celebrate that Sacrament. They both emerged with HUGE smiles on their faces and, I believe, a new incentive to get back into their faith. I’ve been doing stuff like this a lot lately.
Something is happening in the Church and in the world today. And, I know something is happening with me. I can’t recall many times (any?) in my priesthood that I would unabashedly – with great confidence and joy – invite people on the street to these amazing sacraments. Instead, I guess we priests felt that, “if you build it, they will come.” But, build what?

Continue Reading this Amazing Story at http://www.romancatholicman.com/a-priests-conversion-i-get-it-now/

Pax Christi,



The War on Women

31 Jul


This has been really bugging me. It seems many vocal people seem to feel that The Catholic Church is waging a war on women. They say this, of course, while ignoring another growing religion which I have seen to be barbaric in its treatment of women. I’d like to think that they have been brainwashed and do not actually know what Catholics believe about women and marriage, but they are too well conditioned to accept words. I feel the time has come to do as St. Francis admonishes us and preach the Gospel always, using words only when necessary.

The War on Women, is it really being waged by men, or by a few women trying to accomplish I know not what? Everyone has a scapegoat for their unhappiness that they vilify to make themselves feel empowered rather than trusting in God. Ask a woman and its all about gender, ask a black person it’s all about race, ask a devout Christian and it all about the proliferation of non-Christian beliefs into the main stream. The point is that nobody wants to admit its really about them.

Now the part that’s going to really bake your noodle, if it’s all about them then why am I writing this? Lets us start with some basic background, and then move to how you as a husband, father, fiancée, boyfriend, or single man looking for the right woman can help to change things for the better.

Given the state of women in today’s society, I don’t see the liberation they thought they were signing up for. I see a lack of respect, a lack of responsibility, and a general lack of good manners in how men are seeing women thanks in large part to the attitude changes some women have propagated. Those of us left who try to hold a door for a lady, stop to help change a tire, or carry groceries are frequently reviled and or rebuffed for our efforts. Sexual liberation hasn’t accomplished much either. I see women being passed around like a tap at a keg party. Used, and then handed off to the next person. Sex is so frequent and liberal that men expect it by the second date (or sooner) – because women have been obliging and in doing so set that expectation themselves. The number of rapes and sexual assaults continue to rise as liberated women have imbued men with a false expectation of no-strings sex. Divorce runs rampant as women have become disposable. Think of the term “Starter Wife” which came into vogue only in this generation.

When a man sees a scantily dressed woman acting seductively, is he thinking marriage or sex? Is he thinking wife or sexual plaything? Does he see the mother of his children? A woman whose company and counsel he will value forever? For men this is rhetorical question, but for many women it becomes problematic. A woman may feel pressured to dress and act a certain way to compete when it comes to being noticed, but by dressing and acting a certain way men will tend to assume her intentions are carnal and short term with little thought that they might be otherwise. Whether we like it or not, how we dress and act sends very clear messages to those around us. We accept this as fact when it comes to success in business but not in pair-bonding. Why not?

As a husband, I have to admit that I enjoy when my wife dresses seductively or uses body language to say the same thing to me. The feeling I get when such signals are sent to me by the one person in the universe I want most to receive them from are one of the great gifts the sacrament of matrimony bestows. I also admit it makes me uncomfortable when others ogle or send signals of their own, especially when they persist in spite of the ring she is wearing or her making her disinterest clear. It bothers me most that so many in this world ignore the sanctity of marriage, it’s not like a wedding band is hard to miss. I don’t feel alone in this though, as I can be pretty oblivious at times and my wife has noticed other women sending such signals even when I missed it, until it became blatant, and also had a definite reaction to it. There is a sense of exclusive belonging between bonded partners in a sacramental marriage that manifests itself in a sense that you belong to your spouse and they to you. Before you get all worked up, open your bible (even you protestants) to 1 Corinthians 7:4 where it will say:

“The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.”

Pray on it, think on it, sleep on it… Take note that each has authority over the other, one of the hardest things in marriage can be surrendering yourself to your wife and for her the same issues can exist. You must care for each other, nurture each other, and work together in achieving salvation.

As a man you can make a huge difference by acting with a sense of chivalry and respect. Open doors for ladies, be respectful in your speech both with and around them, avert your eyes when faced with lust provoking sights, treat all women as though Christ were standing next to you watching your every move. Teach your daughters what they should expect in a husband, and show other women that they can be respected and recognized without resorting to degrading themselves in dress or action. Build up your wife and daughters. Their self esteem will be both a sword and shield. Ensure that they know with certainly that they do not wear their value on their face or chest, nor do they carry it in their groin. With a proper example, they will demand better from then men around them. Change will not be instant – but neither was the decline, but change will happen and things will improve if we persevere. If this constitutes a war on women then so be it, but I prefer to think of it as winning the hearts and minds of women to restore the partnership between couples which God himself ordained.

A sacramental marriage must be freely chosen by both parties. A couple must remain free to choose throughout their marriage. Love itself is a choice one must make anew each day, as husbands you must work to make that choice an easy one. No husband wants a wife who’s heart is not in the marriage, who’s love and commitment are forced, half-hearted, or given with reservations. Marriage is like making love, it’s always at its best with an enthusiastic partner who is fully focused and actively participating.

Sacramental Marriage has lost its revered place in society. Why are women who take pride in the husbands, homes, and families ridiculed, belittled, or even scorned for doing so? Why are women who choose to be homemakers asked by other men and women alike why they are wasting their lives? What about being a success and having a career? Since when was being a Mother not a full time Job? How is letting strangers raise your children, teach them their ABC’s, witness their first steps, anything but a destruction of motherhood? All for what? A few dollars that barely pay for day care and other expenses associated with working only because a woman has been convinced it is necessary for her to feel important? Why the shock and surprise in our society when a woman freely chooses such a life and finds great joy and fulfillment in her labors? In the end is that not what we all seek, but few ever find? Can we not be happy for those who have found it instead of looking down on them? Motherhood is the most important job in the world, you’ll only have children a short time in your lifespan. Focus on them, you can have a career later. Teach them well all the things one cannot learn in school. You’ll get one shot at this only, there are no do-overs.

A husband has a duty to ensure that he does whatever he can to ensure his wife’s hopes and dreams become reality, especially because he realizes that as they become one, her dreams become their dreams and her happiness becomes their happiness. As a husband and father of 3 daughters, I fear for them greatly in finding a man who understands commitment and responsibility. Being married should help a woman achieve her dreams within her marriage and not end them. A sacramental marriage should provide the freedom to explore interests, not quash them. Granted there are restrictions and both must work before play, but it is in both working and playing together toward each others goals that an unbreakable bond is forged. If you expect your wife to support your dreams you must support hers. Sharing in those dreams with her will be your greatest source of joy and happiness. I’ve found myself exposed to all manner of things I would never had pursued of my own interest by sharing some of my wife’s dreams like becoming a HAM radio operator, and I discovered that in encouraging and sharing her dream I also shared in the joy and happiness the hobby has brought her. When was the last time your wife expressed a dream or desire and you went to work to make it happen for her? If its been too long, then maybe it’s time to do it again.

Remember one man cannot hope to singlehandedly change the world, but one man’s actions in the imitation of Christ can change another’s persons life and outlook. Paid forward, it can become a wave of positive change the world over.

Activities Together – Ham Radio

18 Jun


You know, I get a lot of questions from couples who seem to have nothing in common anymore. They claim that they have drifted apart and have no common hobbies or areas of interest to bind them together. While I am both a fan and proponent of ensuring that each spouse has the ability to pursue their own interests as appropriate within a sacramental marriage, I am not a fan of chasing your own interests to the exclusion of doing anything together. In fact, not too long ago following one of my wife’s childhood interests to fruition became a rather joyful journey for both of us.

Ever since she was a young woman, she had an interest in Ham radio. Her father however did not encourage her interest. Having failed to pass the licensing exam himself, even though he was an electrical engineer, he was probably sure it was far beyond the capabilities of a teenage girl. I supposed that in addition to the various knowledge required to pass the exam, the amount of money involved in getting set up for DXing (long distance communications, e.g. Worldwide) can be prodigious, even if you “homebrew” or build it yourself. VHF can be gotten into for under $50 and allows communication for over a hundred mile radius if there is a repeater handy, but getting set up for DX can cost easily over a grand using combinations of used and home brewed equipment.

I’ve done my best over the years to make sure that my wife would see our marriage as a vehicle to achieving her dreams rather than an impediment to exploring the world and experiences around her. So when she mentioned to me that she had always wanted a ham license so she could talk to the world and get QSL (contact confirmation) cards from all over the world. I thought it was a fine idea. I got us both VHF HT’s (handi-talkies) for communication on the local clubs repeater, joined the local club, and studied with her for the exam. As a former radioman in the US Navy I had a huge advantage in that most of it was more of a review for me, and because radio and electronics repair had been a job I had long ago ceased to find her level of wonder in.


Enthusiasm is infectious and uplifting in any marriage, and a great for sharing joy, wonder, and happiness together. Whether it is in the bedroom, in daily interaction, or in hobbies it is a wonderful tool for bonding and teaching each other to find the joy in activities – even those which had gone stale. In my case radio. As she studied the for her test I began building out our home radio shack. I located and purchased a Yaesu FT-840 HF transceiver (a solid radio I could easily repair), I built a current balun (to keep dangerous RF out of our home), and obtained and hung a G5RV wire antenna, then bought an LDG Antenna Tuner and a very quiet Samlex 35 amp power supply. She could listen to the world, listen to the people talk, the shortwave bands. She was captivated, and I was pleased. We were regularly attending the club meetings and shortly after passing our technician and general exams in the same sitting together (our 11 year old passed her technician at the same time) we became full members of the club and began exploring the airwaves together. The total outlay was pretty hefty, but her smiles and laughter were worth it – and because of her I was finding a renewed love and enthusiasm for the hobby that had once been a job (and still is from time to time part of my work). We even have been able to share my love of all things naval and nautical and when she found a Museum Ships Weekend radio contest and we joyfully reached out to as many of the ships as we could, many we had toured together and a few I had been aboard in the military. We’re even looking forward to participating in a DX expedition to the South Pacific in the future, to sail on a windjammer and install radios and solar gear onto otherwise isolated atolls and islands while making as many new contacts as possible around the world!

Now that we’ve been doing this awhile I’ve learned some more interesting things that make working the radio as a team a lot more fun than one might imagine.

1. A woman’s voice breaks through pile-ups better than all the legal wattage in the world!
2. Most QSL clubs like the Century Club (www.3905ccn.com) make combos extra points towards awards and contests – meaning that more people than ever want to talk to you both when you sign in together.
3. If you want to master teamwork, try working a busy net where you are the focus of attention, 2 are better than one. If you can learn to intuit what is needed of each other in this activity then you can carry that breakthrough into other parts of your marriage.
4. It gives you something to look forward to for time together at home and can be done 24 hours a day, so no excuses for not making time.
5. There is more joy in sharing the excitement of your spouses success than there is in succeeding yourself – and there is nothing more exciting that watching your wife blossom before your eyes from her accomplishments and sharing in that joy.

All in all, I gained a new insight on ham radio and an appreciation for things I might never have realized held so much joy for me as well. Whereas I would love to say that I knew this all along, I cannot. I also gained the chance to find a new sense of wonder in both my hobby and my marriage, because its the discoveries we make along the way and not the destination alone which define us. Life is not a race, dare to eat a peach, stop to smell a rose, and take a path less traveled hand in hand – because those are the experiences that both define and bind us.

Have you ever shared a hobby with your spouse? Did it bring you closer together? Did you enjoy it more than you expected? Did it encourage you to try something you didn’t think you’d like? and if so did you discover that you liked it?


Colin Corcoran

**Please feel free to write or comment on this post, I’d really like to hear from those that are able to have this experience and how it is changing their marriage, their wives, and their lives.


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